I gotta leave you baby, please don’t make me stay.
You sing that shit it’s like you’re digging your own
grave. You’re not seeking a cure, not sewing
up the seams or saying your Hail Marys. You don’t
even dream of getting into heaven. Heaven.
Dreamhouse. A garden party in the back yard starring
a cleaned up Mr. James in his uncomfortable tuxedo.
Fuck it. You dig until you die. You carve a hole
for your sadness and dance inside it, like a worm
in a jumping bean. Feel bad this morning. Feel
like I wanna cry. My lover’s hair was blue-black.
He presented the jewels to me in a blue velvet box.
Stars, he said, for the movie star. Tonight
my house roars with music. The noise ordinance
cops are on their way in their deep blue cars.
It’s deep. So deep, I whispered, biting down on his
ear lobe. I was a pit and he was falling.
My hands on his warm ass. My chest is a guitar hole
and I’m jacking up the music until the windows break.
Gargle with cognac, with
semen, with sweat. Me and Elmore, a couple
of ghosts leaning on each other.
Tomorrow we’ll paint the whole house blue.
Glue dimes on the walls to look like stars. I’m wearing
his hat, his tie. His slick shoes.
I’ve lost my baby, almost lost my mind.
March 30, 2012, 6:07pm